True Love Is Forgiving Your Spouse for Accusing You of Pooping the Bed

I debated about putting this funny memory on my blog, because it is still fairly embarrassing to me (even though it has been a few years since it happened). However, it is just too hilarious to not share, so here it goes...

Anyone who knows me well knows that I have a sleepwalking and sleep talking problem. The condition is definitely linked to stress, because anytime I get overwhelmed, my "incidents" increase substantially. My amazing husband puts up with my crazy alternate sleep-walking self incredibly well (except for last night when he woke me up from sleep talking by rudely sleep arguing with me. Apparently my persistent and annoying subconscious habit has awakened some sleep talking tendencies in him too).

We had only been married for about 4 years, and one night I had a dream that he got up out of bed, walked into the bathroom, and came back into the bedroom carrying a towel. He laid the towel down on his side of the bed, and that is when my nostrils were accosted with a very foul odor. I asked him what he was doing, and he casually said "Oh, I just had a little accident", as he laid the towel over the soiled spot on the sheet and climbed back in bed. I reacted the same way I would have if I were not dreaming - by looking at him in disgust, grabbing my pillow and a blanket, and stomping to the living room where I laid down on the couch to sleep.

Although this whole thing was a dream, it seemed very real. Even down to the smell of the poop. In fact, it was so realistic that I had actually gotten up and sleep-walked to the living room where I laid down on the couch and stayed there the rest of the night. 

The next morning, I woke up to Kevin walking into the living room with a very confused look on his face. He asked me why I was sleeping on the couch, and I said accusingly, "Because you crapped the bed!". As soon as I saw the look on his face after I made that statement, I realized that I had dreamed it all up. I was relieved that he didn't actually have a bowel movement in our bed, but I was also incredibly embarrassed that I thought it had really happened. I wish I had a snapshot of his expression, which was a strange mixture of surprise, amusement, and irritation. It takes talent to pull off that kind of expression. I could tell he was insulted (wouldn't you be?), and I tried to pretend that I was still asleep so that I wouldn't have to admit to him that I had thought my crazy dream was real. My act didn't work though, because I couldn't hold back my embarrassed giggles for very long. Thankfully, Kevin also has a sense of humor and quickly forgave me for insulting him.

Thanks for putting up with me and all of my sleepwalking weirdness, Kevin! True love is forgiving your spouse for accusing you of pooping the bed :)